Book a Table



By Elles Pinfold

It's no wonder pop’s princesses need to blow off steam once in a while. The poor loves occupy a tumultuous world where fabulous wealth and fabulous shoes are offset with an unending flow of patronizing open-letters, sweaty-palmed iCloud hackings and damned if you do/damned if you don’t surgery decisions. The kind of steam that result in an orange boiler-suit (shout to part-time pop queen all-time actress LiLo who is barely out of one). You know, from that time you indulged in a public brawl, concealed class A's in the walls of your mansion or simply took the Escalade for a spin doped up on prescription painkillers? We’ve all been there right? Right. 

While of course we’d never condone dangerous or illegal activity, sometimes it’s real hard to be a woman.  This month Tribute Tuesdays salutes our wayward sisters. From the ones who need a hug to the ones who just don’t give a fuck.  

Here’s five of our mad & bad & dangerous faves in no particular order...

Cheryl Cole - Fight For This Love

It's hard to believe these days, with her flawlessly rehearsed butter-wouldn’t-melt immaculately PR’d people’s princess X Factor schitck, that La Fernandez-Versini (nee Tweedy, formerly Cole) was once the owner of an over-plucked eyebrow and a mean left hook.  One would imagine that although toilet attendant Sophie Amogbokpa’s face has long since recovered from its manicured pounding, she probably doesn’t tune in on a Saturday night to admire Chez’s plasticky L’Oreal ombre.

TLC - No Scrubs

Before her untimely death in 2002, TLC’s Lisa Left Eye Lopez was a not-to-be-messed-with force of nature with a penchant for criminal damage, whose rich pop tapestry included burning down her football player boyfriend Andre Rison’s house in 1994 and recording a single with Mel C in 2000.  

Bjork - Violently Happy

Back in the halcyon days of the mid '90s Bjork was hanging out in the Milk Bar, nailing style, making seminal records and punching photographers who got on the wrong side of her.  Heaven help the pap who ignores the privacy wishes of this brilliant woman. 

Britney Spears - Crazy

Transitioning from child-star to balanced functioning adult is a near impossible task, and no-one knows this better than Madame Spears. In 2008 she was arrested over a custodial dispute with her ex-husband K-Fed, an event which followed her infamous head-shave in 2007 and a management orchestrated drug raid of her home that unearthed crystal meth behind a trap door. All of which screamed BRITNEY NEEDS SOME HELP GUYS.  And maybe a lifetime of whale-song punctuated public-eye free solitude. Not: Britney needs to be a judge on American X Factor and a career re-launch. Which succeeded in being the uncomfortable coda to her downward spiral in 2012.  

Grace Jones - Love Is The Drug

It's perhaps no surprise a woman as fearless and uncompromising as Grace Jones has had a brush or two with the law. But although she’s not been without difficult times Jones is far from the Hollywood-victim sterotype. Her court  testimony during a 1989 charge of cocaine possession?  "I don’t do drugs." Of course. Ahem. The Jamaican pop queen has since been much more open about her use of substances professing a love of weed and LSD. 

Join Tribute Tuesdays tomorrow night (Tuesday 9th September) for B*tches Behind Barz at Dalston Superstore from 8pm - late.

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